Developing Multi-Cultural Etiquette

By George Smith & David Compton

With the influx of foreign investors in today's market, it is important that you properly prepare to effectively interact with them. To pursue these investors, we suggest that you go to www.google.com and type in “Consular Offices, California,” (or whichever state you are in) to advise them about the wonderful investment opportunities in American properties. We also suggest that you search under the category “Foreign Trade Offices” in your state.

Let's talk specifically about developing “multi-cultural” manners. When interacting with a person of another culture or ethnicity, it is important to apply the “Platinum Rule” as opposed to the “Golden Rule.” The “Platinum Rule” says that you should treat the other person as THEY (not you) want to be treated. This means respecting the traits and traditions that have been infused into their behavior by their culture. While one can always apply the phrase “When In Rome...”, the real estate profession and the N.A.R. have recognized the need to go the extra mile to create that zone of comfort essential for effective interaction.

The following “Norms” are, for the most part, universal in their application.

• Learn at least a few phrases of their language if different from your own.
• Show appreciation for the other's customs, music, and art; do not criticize them.
• Be sensitive and non-judgmental on politics and religion; avoid discussing these if possible.
• Build on the other's cultural heritage to enhance communication, rather than trying to impose your own.
• Show good intentions and consideration and follow-up on promises.
• Extend respect to those who the customer cares about - for instance, the elderly, children, family, religious affiliations, and whatever groups the customer identifies with.
• Use common sense and credit the other person for having it as well.
• Acknowledge mistakes and apologize when appropriate.
• Minimize talk about the United States.
• In general, try to listen more and talk less.
• Do not tell the other what to do; you do not know what is appropriate.
• Do not talk about family unless they are present or the other person mentions them.
• Help the other see the “Big Picture” by sharing information.
• Seek to share the other person's ceremonies and celebrations.
• Recognize that you will need to be more formal and take more time in doing business than is your normal practice.
• Be punctual, even if it does not seem to be customary for the culture you are dealing with; many cultures regard tardiness as a character flaw, and they know that in American culture we would be insulted if another person was late for a meeting.
• Get names and contact information correct.
• Take the blame for language barriers and difficulties.
• Do not tell jokes; they have a very high probability of being misunderstood.
• Show deference and respect to the elderly; stand when they enter, wait for them to speak or when they extend their hands in greeting.
• Treat members of the opposite gender with respect. Always err on the side of formality.
• Be patient and forgiving if a member of the opposite gender has trouble determining how to treat you; remember that other cultures differ on the roles of men and women in business relationships and may have difficulty adjusting to the expectations in the United States.
• Skip the efforts to try to create an “instant friendship”.
• Respect the concept of “face” as in “saving face” - never do anything to embarrass another person, either in that person's eyes, in the eyes of others, or in your own eyes. In the same way, do not sacrifice your own “face” in front of others as well.
• Try to fit in and be comfortable without making a fool of yourself.
• While these are important behaviors to embrace, there are other behaviors that you will want to avoid. Just to be on the safe side, and until you learn better from your customer, avoid the following behaviors:
• Standing with your hands in your pockets
• Using first names
• Asking personal questions
• Asking about their family
• Crossing your legs
• Showing the soles of your shoes
• Fleeing or invading the other's personal space
• Seeking direct eye contact
• Initiating any physical contact
• Showing impatience

Putting positive attitudes, communication skills and multicultural manners into action with the varieties of people in your marketplace is certainly necessary on a personal level each and every day. Be aware that you may also need to make some changes in the way you and your office deal with specific business situations that involve multiple cultures.